Ask Dan Question & Answer

(An index of subjects covered on the Q & A page of the web site,

 the Newsletters, and Dan and Jay's books  can be found on the

 Index of Subjects page)

Question #93:
Dan: We have a 4 1/2 year old son who has been an enthusiastic hockey fan/ competitive player since age of 3. He's now playing with 7 yr. olds on the mini-mite level and seems to have talent with the stick. He's good at golf and baseball and we're trying to get him away from hockey for awhile, but are unsure if that's the right thing to do. Our garage is the local neighborhood rink for 8 to 12 kids, so it's daily. In your newsletter you advise playing other sports. But he wants to play garage hockey constantly. Any advice? P.I. in CA

Dan Replies:
Dear P.I.: I can't think of a form of backyard sports that could be harmful and that should be limited. I mean, what else does he do that gives him a great appetite, gets him right to sleep at night, and (in the future) keeps his mind off girls?

I'm going attach a section from our third book (Pitcher's Hands is OUT) in which our fictional grandfather (who bears a striking resemblance to my father right down to the French coin drop magic trick he does so well) explains why sandlot (backyard) games are very good for kids at any age.

Further, we firmly believe it's sandlot sports that develop the skills that make for excellence in sports. It was our backyard hockey rink that got me to the NHL - it wasn't organized youth hockey.

When we advise in our books and newsletters to "hang up the skates for the summer", that advice is for organized sports. But as for backyard games, your little guy is four. This play is important developmentally (both physically and socially). Besides and perhaps most importantly - it's his childhood, let him decide how to spend the free time portions of it.

In summary, you take the garage hockey away and you have me to deal with! I actually play roller hockey with the kids in my neighborhood in the summer. It's a panic to have the doorbell ring and the kids say to my wife, "Mrs. Bylsma, can Dan come out and play?"

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