Even before the words came, he knew by his wife's cracking voice that his life had been forever changed.

"Our love had created a heartbeat," Bylsma would write later.   "Over the course of 38 weeks that heartbeat had fueled our hopes and dreams for the future.  Then mysteriously, the little heartbeats stopped."

The heart wrenching story about the Bylsma's stillborn child, included in the epilogue of Bylsma's book entitled, So Your Son Wants To Play In The NHL (Sleeping Bear Press, $24.95), is just one of many passages that shows this isn't intended to be a traditional hockey book.

When Dan's father, Jay talked to the Michigan-based publisher about doing a book about the journey he made in beating the odds to land in the NHL, they made it clear that they would have a message throughout the book.

"My father and I don't think our lives are book worthy," Bylsma said.   "We came up with an outline for a book that certainly includes a lot about my family and my trip to the NHL, but it's more about family values, raising children and some of the things that it takes to be successful."

Although the book started out with a small amount of publicity, it is already into its second printing.  Bylsma said he and his father have received e-mails and feedback which makes it clear their message is hitting home with readers.

"Certainly hockey is how the message is told," Bylsma said. "But it's really a book about parenting.  It's about saying the important thing in life is not raising your kids to be pro athletes, or NHL players, or basketball players, or for that matter force them to be a doctor.  The purpose of child rearing should be to provide a moral compass, a strong education, a good family, a strong support system.  Then the kid's goals will take over."

In the book's beginning, the elder Bylsma gives his perspective on raising a family and Bylsma explains how he felt growing up in a family with three brothers and a sister.   Toward the end, Dan Bylsma provides his thoughts on pursuing a NHL career and his father writes about watching him.

What provides Bylsma's commentary with richness is that he followed a difficult path to the NHL.  After playing for Bowling Green, Bylsma had no NHL offers.  He started his career in the East Coast Hockey League in 1992-1993 and toiled three years in the minors before reaching the NHL.

"What my parents tried to instill in me is that life isn't fair, but you work as hard as you can and be satisfied," Bylsma said.  "What I say as an adult is that what made my career wasn't skill and talent, but rather hard work and perseverance.  As I say at the end of the book, anyone can work hard and anyone can be determined."

When Bylsma was writing last fall, he mentioned his wife's pregnancy.  After his daughter died, Bylsma considered removing references about the child, and then realized that part of the message of the book was that preparing for the difficulty of life was more important that preparing for the NHL.  That's when he opted to discuss the death in the epilogue.  The book is also dedicated to her memory.

What isn't in the book is that last week, Bylsma's wife, Mary Beth, gave birth to a healthy son named Bryan.

"It was an emotional time for us," Bylsma said. "We were nervous the last couple of weeks.  We were thrilled to hear him cry."

By Kevin Allen, USA Today